why i don't swim in the ocean

exhibit A.

(via)

exhibit B.

windy

 

believe the hype: chicago is pretty okay.  if it weren't for that one thing, i'd be renting a uhaul right now.

 

when i told the woman panhandling on michigan ave that i didn't have any cash, she replied, "have a good weekend!"  midwestern friendliness.

knowing which door to open has its rewards.

 

did i take the el to wicker park so i could walk by championship vinyl?  would you expect anything less?

 

everywhere you go, there you are.

 i'm composing an ode to public transport.  also, a realization: houston is a city for people who don't like cities.

caving

call it laziness, or streamlining, or whatever it is those crazy kids are doing, but i got me a tumblr too.


crescent rolls!

old habits

 

I guess I'm collecting again.

a la spinal tap

yesterday i encountered a pair of men's dress loafers abandoned in the grass outside ben taub.  today, there were pink flip flops left sad and lonely on the sidewalk. conclusion: triple-digit temperatures are causing spontaneous combustion that incinerates all but the hardiest of leather and rubber.

bauhaus-esque fascist snoozefest

from "I'm Comic Sans, Asshole":


[People love me. Why? Because I'm fun. I'm the life of the party. I bring levity to any situation. Need to soften the blow of a harsh message about restroom etiquette? SLAM. There I am. Need to spice up the directions to your graduation party? WHAM. There again. Need to convey your fun-loving, approachable nature on your business' website? SMACK. Like daffodils in motherfucking spring.]

my bitterness towards comic sans began in middle school, when my mother forced me to scroll through every font available in Microsoft Publisher until she found the perfect one to complement her sunday school handouts.  inexplicably, she always came back to it.  because what says 'fun-loving' and 'spiced up' more than a prayer card with 'bless me father, for i have sinned' in jaunty type?

rofl

slowly trying to wean myself off of learning about the world through the internet and move towards reading about it in books.  how quaint!

had i moved to manhattan and majored in english

[I had worn a black wool beret out of the house to see if it was something i could pull off, but had taken it off in the store and stuffed it in my pocket because it made me feel like I was wearing a sandwich board that said THIS GIRL IS WEARING A HAT.]


- Carlene Bauer, Not That Kind Of Girl


reading this book gave me a picture of what my life might possibly be like in an alternate universe.

flavors of childhood

 - teaberry gum.  my mother always had a pack in her purse that i would fish for as we traveled the aisles of the grocery store.  someone told me recently it tastes like pepto-bismol, but i beg to differ.  whatever, more for me.

- stella d'oro anisette sponge cookies.  delicious by themselves, better dunked in tea or coffee, wretched when stale.  [sugar-coated fennel seeds, the kind that they leave by the door of indian restaurants instead of starlight mints, are sweet and anise-y enough to recreate a little bit of the cookie flavor, and are currently in prime snacking position in my desk drawer.]

- peanut butter twix.  i am forever indebted to whoever brought these back.

remnant